One of the interesting developments in the wake of the 2020 election (by the way, who isn’t glad that the flood political ads and campaign mail has finally stopped?) is the emergence of Parler, which casts itself as an alternative to Facebook and/or Twitter. Recently, and it seems to have accelerated with Facebook deleting the group called “Stop the Steal,” more conservative-minded types have announced their intention to leave Facebook behind for a platform that has promised to not censor information or have allegedly biased algorithms.

Now, to be clear, I’m not commenting on whether moving from Facebook to Parler is a wise move. At the end of the day, that’s a decision made up to the individual. Nor am I commenting on whether Facebook’s deletion of “Stop the Steal” was a smart move. Until the rules change or a court decides otherwise, Facebook is a private company that can do whatever they want with the content on their platform.

What I do want to point out is how both Facebook’s handling of content and the exodus of many conservative types to Parler demonstrates a tendency each of us has- even as Christians- that we would all do well to resist.

Itching Ears

Paul, writing to his apprentice Timothy, makes an observation about people in his second letter to Timothy:

For the time will come when people will not put up with sound doctrine. Instead, to suit their own desires, they will gather around them a great number of teachers to say what their itching ears want to hear.– 2 Timothy 4:3, emphasis added. 

Paul applies this to doctrine in the church…but it’s actually a profound insight into human nature: Generally speaking, we want to hear what we want to hear.

And we dismiss everything else…either by rejecting it outright, ignoring it, or- in today’s culture- making sure it never gets in front of us in the first place.

Typically, that’s going to feel pretty awesome. After all, we love to be confirmed in our thinking. We love thinking we’re right about everything and that we couldn’t possibly be missing it.

However, the long term impacts of that are very negative for at least three reasons.

#1- We weaken ourselves intellectually 

Scripture teaches us that “iron sharpens iron.” If you want to sharpen a knife, you need a knife sharpener. Steak will never sharpen a knife.

Now, it’s more fun to cut steak than it is to sharpen a knife. But if all you do is cut steak, then, over time, your knife is going to get very dull…and if it’s never sharpened, it will become almost useless for what is was made for.

In the same way, when we surround ourselves with only that which we want to hear, that which we agree with, we’re like the knife that always steak but is never sharpened. Over time, we become dull. Our thinking and intellect doesn’t grow. It actually weakens. And, far from making our belief system stronger, it actually makes our belief system very brittle and prone to falling apart at the slightest bit of pressure.

Take the theory of evolution vs. creation for a second: If all you ever hear about evolution is “Humans used to be monkeys”, and you never seek to understand what evolution is actually all about, then you might be shocked and surprised when you find someone who actually knows the theory of evolution and reveals that is not what evolution teaches (It teaches humans and apes have a common ancestor). All of a sudden, what you were taught for years is shown to be inaccurate…and your whole belief system can come crashing down in an instant.

Why? Because it was never challenged…and then at the moment of pressure, you folded like a wet paper towel.

We all need resistance in order to grow. We need to intentionally expose ourselves to opposite view point. We need to seek to understand the “other side.”

Otherwise, we cheat ourselves intellectually- and we do our beliefs a disservice.

#2- We  rapidly diminish our influence. 

Influence has nothing to do with the size of the crowd following you.

It has everything to move the needle with those who disagree with you and move them toward alignment with you.

You can’t do that if the only people you surround yourselves with and the only viewpoints you expose yourself to are those with which you already agree.

Facebook, for instance, if the exodus truly comes about, is likely experience diminished influence because they would not tolerate ideas they deemed unacceptable. Sure, there will be those who cheer how they handled “Stop the Steal”, but in deleting that group, they are chasing off people who don’t agree with them.

And now Facebook will have zero ability to move the needle with that group of people. Influence is diminished.

On the other hand, a conservative on Facebook has the chance to get their ideas in front of people who do not agree. However, if they flee Facebook, that opportunity is gone.

Sure, they are liable to get a lot more likes and more people will see their content on Parler…but it will only be people who already agree anyway.

We should not mistake the volume of the cheers for genuine influence. Because the volume might be loud because you’re in an empty room where all you hear is yourself echoing off the walls.

#3- We end up with a warped our view of people who don’t agree. 

It’s difficult to not be frustrated with the way people talk about each other in this season.

Regardless of where you find yourself on the political spectrum, the way both sides talk about each other makes it seem as if they are the scum of the earth, anti-American, and in general hateful people.

And many times it has very little to do with their actions. Because: if we’re being intellectually honest, each side is very adept at doing precisely what they accuse the other side of doing.

  • Character matters…until your preferred candidate is shown to have done what the other side is doing. Then it has “no effect” on their ability to serve in office. (Think about the reactions of the two sides to President Trump’s character flaws…and President Clinton’s).
  • Election results should be accepted…unless, of course, your candidate loses, and then of course the election is illegitimate, because no one would be stupid enough to vote for the other guy, so it must be rigged. (Think about how Democrats insisted President Trump stole the 2016 election…but now, of course there are no voting irregularities…and, of course, the opposite is true, as President Trump insisted the 2016 results were above board, but now there must be fraud).
  • Supreme Court nominees should be accepted…unless, of course, the nomination would favor the other side, and then it’s obviously an attempt to take over the Republic (Merrick Garland and Amy Coney Barrett, anyone?)

So if it’s not about the actions, what is it about?

The ideas. 

It’s not that people on the “other side” act differently- at least not if we’re being intellectually honest. It’s that people on the “other side” hold ideas that- because we’ve chosen to never hear them, never engage with them, and never think through them- seem to us as not as a different perspective, and not even as merely wrong or misguided, but evil. 

And of course, if people hold evil ideas then they themselves must be that way too.

And if people are evil, then they can’t be compromised with or worked with. Their ideas need to be censored…and they need to be eliminated.

Doesn’t sound like a very loving society, does it?

What to do? 

I don’t think any of us wants a weak intellect, diminished influence, or a warped view of people. However, if we’re not going to end up there, we have to actively resist the tendency to only consume what we want to hear.

We need to pursue different perspectives.

We need to read content we don’t agree with.

We need to have conversations with people who think differently. More than that, we need genuine relationships with people who think differently than us.

That makes all of us better. It makes us wiser…but it also makes us more understanding; more empathetic; more compassionate.

And an understanding, empathetic, compassionate person has an exponentially greater opportunity for influence on “the other side”…simply because they demonstrate that they care.

Wisdom is not just knowing your own belief system inside and out. It’s knowing what others believe inside and out- and how they arrived at those conclusion. It’s being sympathetic as to why they arrived at those conclusions. It’s recognizing that someone arrived there for reasons that are actually legitimate…and probably even logical.

And it’s being willing to listen to those reasons.

And those who are willing to listen are those who are more likely to be given the opportunity to speak and have others listen in return.

And…if you’re willing to lend your ear to “the other side”….you might just find the “other side” becomes interested in what you have to say.