Yesterday, we looked at 2 Samuel 13, which gives the account of Amnon’s rape of Tamar. It is one of the most sordid chapters in all the Bible, and for many it represents a painful and even traumatic reminder of something that happened in their own life.
Even worse, the church (especially in America) has far too often been unhelpful in navigating such matters- particularly when the abuse has happened in a way that connects it to the church. Whether it’s been because of an environment that was conducive to the behavior due to a lack of proper oversight, or an inclination to cover it up and “not air the church’s dirty laundry” to the public, the victims have often received little help, support, or justice through the church’s efforts. Even within our own community (Johnston County), there have been incidents, one very recent, where victims have been shamed at worst and not believed at best.
If you’re a victim of such an act, them I am deeply sorry. You deserve an apology on behalf of the church in America as a whole. You went to perhaps the one place you assumed you’d be safe, to the one person you trusted, and that trust was violated in an unspeakably horrific way. Jesus weeps over that, and the the action taken against you is an action the Lord absolutely despises.
The church can do better. It MUST do better.
With that in mind, here are a few thoughts that I believe can help the church as a whole begin properly navigating allegations of sexual assault within the body of Christ:
#1- Be proactive.
In reading a JoCo Report article regarding a local church whose pastor was arrested on charges of sexual assault, a commenter posted this comment (paraphrased):
“Why are pervs always at church?”
The way the comment read made it seem like churches are full of creeps just waiting to exploit vulnerable minors and women. That’s not the case…but it does raise a fair question: Why is it that we consistently hear reports of sexual assault happening in the context of church?
Part of it is simply this: there is little oversight and no protective policy.
Oversight involves things like security cameras and doors with a glass window so that no one can be “alone” with someone they shouldn’t be alone with. Policy includes simple matters like having more than one adult in the room with minors, never being alone with a minor or someone of the opposite sex who is not your spouse, and requiring routine background checks for all volunteers working with children and students.
This doesn’t solve everything- but it can create an environment that is far less conducive to people who have bad intentions.
Predators are drawn to places where trust is implicit- no policy, no oversight, no background checks. That’s not to say we should be cynical or suspicious; however, it does mean we need to do our homework. That’s why we have security cameras, clear policy, and background checks at LifeSpring.
We can’t guarantee predators will not attempt to enter the fold… but we can create an environment far less conducive to them.
#2- Get the legal authorities involved.
Some churches use the following passage in 1 Corinthians 6:1-6 to justify a refusal to take allegations of sexual assault to law enforcement:
If any of you has a dispute with another, do you dare to take it before the ungodly for judgment instead of before the Lord’s people? 2 Or do you not know that the Lord’s people will judge the world? And if you are to judge the world, are you not competent to judge trivial cases? 3 Do you not know that we will judge angels? How much more the things of this life! 4 Therefore, if you have disputes about such matters, do you ask for a ruling from those whose way of life is scorned in the church? 5 I say this to shame you. Is it possible that there is nobody among you wise enough to judge a dispute between believers? 6 But instead, one brother takes another to court—and this in front of unbelievers!
It is true that the implication of this passage is that we should avoid suing a fellow believer- it just doesn’t create for a good look when two Christians are fighting in front of the world…especially when it involves one demanding payment from the other for a perceived wrong.
However…does that mean that, when a criminal act occurs- and that’s what sexual assault is- we should keep it quiet?
Consider Romans 13:1-5:
Let everyone be subject to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God. 2 Consequently, whoever rebels against the authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and those who do so will bring judgment on themselves. 3 For rulers hold no terror for those who do right, but for those who do wrong. Do you want to be free from fear of the one in authority? Then do what is right and you will be commended. 4 For the one in authority is God’s servant for your good. But if you do wrong, be afraid, for rulers do not bear the sword for no reason. They are God’s servants, agents of wrath to bring punishment on the wrongdoer. 5 Therefore, it is necessary to submit to the authorities, not only because of possible punishment but also as a matter of conscience.
Paul makes it clear here that when we break a criminal law, we are liable to bear the consequences that the government has put in place. No where in Scripture is there any support for the idea that Christians should participate in the cover up of criminal activity simply because the perpetrator is a professing believer.
In my opinion, the appropriate course of action when dealing with matters of sexual assault is to immediately refer the case to local law enforcement. By extension, that also means…
- Take the allegations made by the victim seriously. Never dismiss an allegation because “They would never do that.”
- Comply as fully as possible with any subsequent investigation.
- Other than that, the best response is “No comment; we are allowing the authorities to investigate.”
Some will be reluctant on this, asking “But won’t this make the church look bad if it gets out?”
Sure. But think about how much worse it will be if it’s covered up and leaks out 10 years later. And if there’s anything we’ve learned about these matters, it’s this: they always tend to come to light.
Now- I know that some of those reading this will immediately ask “What about the right of the accused? What about innocent until proven guilty?”
I’m all for that. And I think it’s unwise to issue statements on the assumed guilt or innocence of an alleged perpetrator until an investigation has been completed.
That said, we have to remember that a lost a dying world is watching how the church handles such matters. Our credibility and our witness is at stake. For that reason, any steps taken with the accused should be taken prayerfully and with the consideration of what is best for the mission. Put another way: what is more likely to remove roadblocks to people coming to know Jesus? That answer and other circumstantial factors will determine what to do with the accused during an investigation- and perhaps after it wraps up.
(As an aside: I would say that, particularly for pastors, church staff, and volunteers: Making sure that you are never IN a situation that could be perceived wrongly greatly reduces the risk of facing allegations that you were. The story of Jospeh is instructive. He was a man of integrity, but the charges of rape made by Potipher’s wife were credible because they were the only two people in the house. Part of being proactive is realizing there is an enemy who wants to destroy the church, and he is shrewd and uses not only real actions, but our lack of wisdom in what we do to create space for false accusations to come up. Just use common sense.)
At the end of the day, we also have to remember this: we’re not just dealing with a criminal act. We are dealing with sin- a particularly reprehensible one. Are we going to take it as seriously as it deserves…or are we going to sweep it under the rug?
#3- Protect the victim
NEVER should a victim be shamed for coming forward. NEVER should a victim be dismissed. NEVER should a victim be made to think that bringing this matter to the church authorities was a poor decision or “an act against the church.”
Victims should be cared for. They must be provided (or referred to) counseling. The church should come around the victim to help them journey through this unimaginably painful season.
The victim should be supported- not dismissed. Jesus is near to the broken-hearted; the church should be, too.
#4- Remember that goal: the Great Commission.
As I mentioned before, reality is that people are watching to see how the church navigates these matters. Our witness is on the line- and we don’t become more effective by covering things up in the name of “protecting the church.” We’re actually never told to do that. And doing so by covering up sin is making the assumption that we are somehow responsible for the growth of the church- and we’re not.
Jesus said that HE would build His church (see Matthew 16)- and the gates of hell would not prevail against it. His command to us is to simply be faithful. That means reaching people far from God- and getting anything that would make it difficult for those far from God to meet Jesus out of the way (Acts 15 is instructive in this).
That means actually dealing with sin in the church the right way- in this case, through the legal system.
Sure, there will be some who dismiss it as another sad case of sexual abuse in the church. But others would be refreshed to see the church actually taking it seriously- and, perhaps for a person who has been a victim, they may see that and believe that same church would be a place they could actually find the care and love they need.
Families that brush stuff under the rug as if it never happened are not healthy- they are dysfunctional. Likewise with the church.
However, when the church demonstrates that it is a family that deals with the family problems instead of pretending they don’t exist, that’s what shows the world that we are actually a functional family- and that’s attractive, which thus advances the mission and draws people who would not otherwise know Jesus to His family.
#5- Pursue the truth
This is where things can get really murky, but the story of Joseph (mentioned earlier) is a good illustration. Joseph was the victim. He was accused of something he did not do and was subsequently imprisoned. That was not just. It was wrong.
Likewise is it wrong for someone to be falsely accused of sexual assault.
We absolutely must pursue the truth of what happened and allow the criminal authorities to likewise pursue the truth- wherever that happens to lead. If that leads to the prosecution and imprisonment of a perpetrator, so be it. If they are guilty, they should absolutely suffer the consequences.
However: as I mentioned when we talked about Joseph earlier, we have an enemy that exists to destroy lives. And it is not inconceivable that Satan would use false allegations to attempt to destroy and discredit followers of Jesus. Therefore, if the truth reveals the allegations are false and are perpetrated by someone with ulterior motives, then that should clear the name of the accused and that truth should also be brought into the light.
It is not just for the guilty to go free- but neither is it just for the innocent to be declared guilty. Our prayer should be for the truth to be revealed and justice be served- regardless of which way that goes.