To say that being a new dad is an adventure would be the understatement of my life!
It has been fun, exhausting, thrilling, challenging, joyful, frustrating, and unpredictable- all at the same time! You never know what the next few minutes are going to bring- but that’s part of the fun of it. I have known a joy that is unlike anything I could imagine- and felt a level of tiredness I didn’t know was possible.
One of the most amazing parts of it all, though, is the things I am learning about how God relates to us as people. Those lessons have been humbling, convicting, and challenging for me…and I hope it will be for you as well.
#1- God is immeasurably patient with me.
The second or third day Cayson was home, I was changing his diaper, and it was frustrating me tremendously. It was much easier in birthing class- because the practice baby didn’t move! Real babies, as it turns out, are not so cooperative when it comes to diaper changing. Cayson squirmed, screamed, kicked and flailed- and I finally called in the expert (AKA Mom, AKA Grace, my wife). I never imagined diaper changing could be a TWO PERSON job!
Later on, God taught me something about that: I am the squirming baby- and he is the loving Father. All He wants to do is help me, but I fuss, and kick, and squirm and scream and protest.
Yet He never gets frustrated with me. He never gets upset. He just patiently holds me while He continues to do His work in my life. He doesn’t demand I get it all straightened up RIGHT NOW- He is patient with me as I learn day by day.
That was eye-opening AND convicting- because if I am to show my son an accurate picture of God, I need to be as patient with him as God is with me. THAT improved my attitude with poopy diapers!
#2- I am completely dependent on God.
Cayson is literally helpless with his mom and me. He can do nothing on his own (except poop and pee and spit up. He does those who exactly zero effort).
But that’s so much like us isn’t it? Jesus taught us that apart from Him, we could do nothing. There are things we can do on our own. But, just like my little boy, they involve making a big mess.
Cayson needs his mom and me to clean him, change him, feed him, and soothe him.
We need God to take care of us- to provide for us, direct us, change our attitudes, and calm us when life is crazy. And we NEVER come to a place where we are not dependent on God.
#3- God’s love for me really is unconditional- and so is His approval.
I never knew it was possible to be so proud of someone who hasn’t “done” anything. But I am proud of my son. And I love him more than I could possibly put into words.
He has done nothing to earn that love. He’s done nothing to earn that approval. And he hasn’t had to. He’s just simply been my child.
That is an incredible insight into the heart of God. When we become His child through Jesus, we don’t have to “do” anything to earn His love or approval. We already have it.
We don’t have to check off a religious to-do list to impress Him. He’s already proud of us as our Father.
When we realize that, it changes our lives- because it makes us want to live up to be who God already sees us as. We don’t obey Him FOR love and approval- but FROM love and approval. Our motives change because we understand His posture towards us- and that is what sets us free to thrive as His children.
#4- God’s love for me is truly unfathomable.
It’s Easter Week- the time we talk about how God gave up His only Son to pay for the sin of the world so that we could become children of God.
There is not a chance in the universe I would ever consider doing something like that. I would not trade my son for the life of a friend- much less someone who gets on my nerves- and much less someone who hates me! It would not even enter my mind to do so!
And yet God did just that- even though it was unbearably painful.
When I see Cayson upset (and he doesn’t get that way often- only when he’s “hangry”), it absolutely breaks my heart. I can’t even imagine how the Father’s heart was crushed as His Son was tortured, mutilated, and nailed to a cross.
And yet He allowed it to happen, and Jesus followed through with His Father’s will wholeheartedly- because God loves us- even while we are His enemies.
That is beyond mind-blowing. It is truly unfathomable. And that should move us to total surrender to Jesus- because that kind of love we cannot measure or reciprocate. All we can do in response is WORSHIP.