Once upon a time, my wife Grace talked me into participating with her in a Jillian Michaels workout video.
In my former-college athlete pride and arrogance, I thought to myself: “It’s a women’s workout video. It’ll be a throw-away day.”
WRONG.
The video was 25 minutes long. I lasted 15. As Grace was rolling through it with ease, I found myself on the floor pouring with sweat and begging for Jesus to return!
In short, it was much harder than I thought it was- and I quit before it was over.
By the way- it took me THREE TRIES to actually get through the video. I’ll never scoff at women’s workout videos EVER AGAIN!
As I look back on that, what I realize is this: sometimes things just get too difficult- and you quit. You don’t have the strength, stamina, or stomach to continue. So you throw in the towel.
This goes way beyond workout videos- it goes to life as well.
ANYONE can experience this
One of the greatest mistakes we can make as Christians is assuming that we should never feel like quitting. Such feelings, we are told (often by well-meaning people) are not representative of someone who places their hope in Jesus. Those feelings, we’re told, mean we just don’t trust God enough, and we’re relying too much on ourselves. A “good Christian” or a “true Christian”, we’re told, shouldn’t have such thoughts because they are an overcomer in Christ.
The problem with that line of thinking is it completely ignores what we see in the Bible. The story of Elijah comes to mind (you can read that HERE).
Elijah was a powerful prophet. God used him mightily, and as we read the story of what God did through him, it’s impossible to come away with any other conclusion that Elijah was a man of great faith- nigh unshakable.
And yet after being used in an incredible way by God in 1 Kings 18…we see this take place in 1 Kings 19:
2 So Jezebel sent a messenger to Elijah to say, “May the gods deal with me, be it ever so severely, if by this time tomorrow I do not make your life like that of one of them.”
3 Elijah was afraid and ran for his life. When he came to Beersheba in Judah, he left his servant there, 4 while he himself went a day’s journey into the wilderness. He came to a broom bush, sat down under it and prayed that he might die. “I have had enough, Lord,” he said. “Take my life; I am no better than my ancestors.- 1 Kings 19:2-4, emphasis added
Elijah- one of the mightiest prophets in all history- was ready to throw in the towel barely a day after seeing God do the impossible. He wanted to quit.
Here’s the thing: I doubt there is anyone who would claim to have the faith of Elijah. And yet Elijah himself had a moment where he wanted to quit.
The point here is simple: No matter how close you are to Jesus or how long you’ve been following him, it is completely normal and expected to hit seasons where you just don’t feel like you can take it anymore and you’re ready to throw in the towel.
- That doesn’t mean your faith is weak.
- It doesn’t mean you’re a “bad Christian” or that you’re “not a true Christian.”
- It doesn’t mean you’ve done something wrong and God is getting back at you.
It means you are going through the normal human experience in a world wrecked by sin- where there WILL be moments where you want to quit.
How do I make it through?
The question, then, is not how to avoid the desire to quit; it’s how to make it through the desire to quit. How do we keep moving forward when everything in us is screaming “STOP! I’ve had enough?”
It’s here that we need to understand something crucial: relying on your willpower is not enough.You are not going to be enough motivation for you to keep going when all you want to do is quit.
It doesn’t matter how strong you are or how tough you think you are, given the right combination of factors, anyone can be brought to their knees in surrender to life’s circumstances.
If not willpower, then- what?
As we read the story of Elijah, we see three steps that will help us make it through when we want to quit:
#1- Take care of yourself
It’s interesting that immediately after Elijah says he wants to die, this happens:
All at once an angel touched him and said, “Get up and eat.” 6 He looked around, and there by his head was some bread baked over hot coals, and a jar of water. He ate and drank and then lay down again.
7 The angel of the Lord came back a second time and touched him and said, “Get up and eat, for the journey is too much for you.”- 1 Kings 19:5-7
The Lord didn’t tell Elijah to pray or go read the Bible…he told him to get up and eat.
We dare not dismiss the importance of taking care of ourselves when things get so bad we want to quit. That includes things like eating right, exercising, and resting. It means not simply pounding Oreos and half-gallons of ice cream while binge-watching Netflix until 3 AM and then waking up at 8 to do it all over again.
We can’t control our circumstances, but we can control whether we “let ourselves go” or take care of our body. And yes- that’s a spiritual matter. God put us in a body to serve him- and when we fail to take care of our body, it limits our ability to do so.
Taking care of yourself puts you in a position to take a step forward at a time. Refusing to care for ourselves simply accelerates our desire to throw in the towel.
#2- Get in front of God
It’s interesting that in the process of wanting to quit, the Lord keeps asking him the same question: “What are you doing here?” The first time Elijah responds, the Lord responds like this:
The Lord said, “Go out and stand on the mountain in the presence of the Lord, for the Lord is about to pass by.- 1 Kings 19:11
The single most important thing we can do when we want to quit is get in front of God. Interestingly enough, that’s the very thing our instincts seem to keep us from. In Elijah’s case, he ran. In our case, we avoid church, distract ourselves with mindless activities, and try to numb the pain through various methods.
We avoid the one thing that is most helpful.
What happens when we get in front of God is this: First, we can unload. God can handle it. He isn’t afraid of our feelings and He doesn’t condemn us in our feelings. What He does do, though, is the second thing that happens: He gives us directions. One of which is…
#3- Go back.
The Lord said to him, “Go back the way you came, and go to the Desert of Damascus. When you get there, anoint Hazael king over Aram. 16 Also, anoint Jehu son of Nimshi king over Israel, and anoint Elisha son of Shaphat from Abel Meholah to succeed you as prophet.- 1 Kings 19:15-16
Often, the desire to quit leads us sideways to a path that is only…well, sideways. When we run away as we want to quit, we actually step off the path God has for us.
The way we get back to it? Go back to it. Go back to doing what you know God wants you to do.
In Elijah’s case, he had a purpose: go and fulfill the duties of a prophet. God’s call on Elijah’s life hadn’t changed just because circumstances became too much to bear.
And the same thing is true in our case. When we want to quit, the best thing we can do is go back and remember what God has given us responsibility over. It could be…
- Your relationship with Him
- Your marriage
- Parenting your child
- Taking care of yourself
- Honoring your parents
- Being a good employee/ boss
- …and so more.
I’m learning that we can make serious progress when we go back and remember what God has called us to do in the first place. Yes- we may feel like quitting right now- which is why we need to redirect our focus off the outcomes and put it on the inputs.
We can’t control the outcomes. Those are up to God. BUT- we can control our inputs and whether we are being faithful to what God has said in the first place.
Will make things better? Probably not. Will it be easy? No way!
But it does give us a pathway forward. It does identify our next steps. And it’s in taking those next steps that we eventually make it through the season of wanting to quit.
Wanting to quit isn’t something we snap out of. It’s something we journey through. And as we take care of ourselves, get in front of God, and get back to doing the things God has made us responsible for, then- one step at a time- we move forward.
And eventually, we get to the other side.